Malaysian Plane Found in Australian Maintenance Hangar

PERTH --

Australian aviation authorities announced today that crews have located the missing Malaysian Airlines flight 370 after over three weeks of globally-coordinated search efforts. The missing aircraft, which vanished from air control radars on March 8, was discovered by maintenance technicians early this morning in an Eastern Australian maintenance yard.

"It's the damnedest thing, you know?" says hydraulic inspection tech Cooper Ashcroft. "I'm off signing for a load of kero, trying to finish up this scheduled service, and all my crew is standing around gobsmacked looking at the bird."

According to hangar foremen, the aircraft arrived the morning after it went off radar for an unscheduled C service. Instructions were made to repaint the craft as a Qantas flight, but overhauls were hampered by what appeared to be a full cargo hold of baggage.